Ladies and gentlemen and variations thereupon, welcome aboard

My blog kind of just happened/happens

spoken-not-written:

renaroo123:

spoken-not-written:

I WAS TAKING A SELFIE AND WAS GONNA MAKE A TEXT POST SAYING HI I’M PETER PAN BUT MY GRANDMA SAW ME AND I’VE NEVER BEEN SO TERRIFIED AND THIS HAPPENED

image

Jake that’s a pot…

You’re a pot.

marilynmeth:

porkrub:

aidenmorse:

Bottles of Gatorade Blue Bolt floating in a bath of Powerade Mountain Blast, 2013

Is this supposed to be art

marilynmeth:

porkrub:

aidenmorse:

Bottles of Gatorade Blue Bolt floating in a bath of Powerade Mountain Blast, 2013

Is this supposed to be art

alphasandassociates:

deezyville:

officialalltimelow:

*whispers* Its almost hoodie season

Which means stick to well lit and highly populated areas at night if you’re Black.

image

In a study of injuries in 90 patients injured by rubber bullets, one died, 17 suffered permanent disabilities or deformities and 41 required hospital treatment after being fired upon with rubber bullets.

—So when the cops claim this is a humane, legitimate crowd control tactic, they’re straight up lying to your face. Don’t let them bullshit you. (x)

(Source: ahsadler)

the-study-of-wumbo:

stereolights:

It’s like his snoring got so bad that his wife left him and now he’s just forever alone with his extra-strength Breathe Right strips

maybe the strips were so effective that he inhaled his wife

the-study-of-wumbo:

stereolights:

It’s like his snoring got so bad that his wife left him and now he’s just forever alone with his extra-strength Breathe Right strips

maybe the strips were so effective that he inhaled his wife

lendoro:

baddadsquad:

gentle-puffer-fish:

  • falling asleep on someone’s chest
  • wrapping your arms around each other
  • synching heartbeats and breathing slowly
  • falling asleep in big t-shirts and underwear
  • forehead kissies and murmured affections
  • naps
  • MONSTER TRUCKS

image

(Source: gentleguineapig)

shak1ra:

redevoted:

bowserfucker:

oknope:

imagine reading a book of all the lies you’ve told 

IDK what kind of lives you all are leading, but this sounds like the boringest shit. “Yes I sent that email.” “Yeah, I like your outfit.” “I was sick.” “My mom said no” “No I wasn’t crying.” “Yes I read the Terms of Service”

what about a book of all the lies people have told you

Oh how the tables have turned

chelseamourning:

chubbythecorgi:

My friend sent me this amazing corgi comic! (originals found here)

THIS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER

inbetweenfictionandreality:

"I waited too long to read the sequel, and now I can’t even remember the characters."

                                                                                            A novel by me

themouseabides:

Knowledge is knowing that Frankenstein is not the monster.

Wisdom is knowing that Frankenstein is the monster.

imawanchor:

dylanofryin:

actual picture of actual one direction fans image

it’s like a scene from a zombie movie

samwinchesters-killerpenis:

conor-cymex:

paigefillyr:

riverdanceinhell:

so you know how everyone is always like lol illuminati 666 hail satan the south will rise again etc.

well today i was like hey what exactly was the illuminati anyways? and i

image

oh

Next time on: I didn’t know I was a member of the Illuminati.

Plot twist: Tumblr is literally the Illuminati.

am i in a cult

(Source: pendletons)

peachified:

i love the teenage mutant ninja turtles!! leonardo, raphael, donatella and versace!!!

zapidos:

My little brother and I were swimming and my dad walked out and said “it’s trash day tomorrow you know what that means” and my brother looked at me dead in the eyes and said “it’s time for you to go.”

dggus:

i talk a lot of shit for someone who can’t choose rude dialogue options in games because i’m scared of hurting a characters feelings